Celebrating Love & Embracing Elderhood Through Service
Finding Purpose, Fulfillment and Happiness by Volunteering and Giving
By Peter Galli
As February is the month of love, the month in which we celebrate Valentine’s Day, I wanted to write a profile about Ed Tauscher, my partner of 25-years and husband of 17.
His life story is one of resilience and finding purpose through service and always helping others: whether that be his country through Active Duty military service; working at the American Legion as a Service Officer helping our veterans; or volunteering at a variety of charities in countries across the globe, including right here at GenPride.
So here we go:
Ed (right) and his best friend Tim after Ed piloted the pictured Piper Warrior at Kessler Air Force Base in Mississippi (1985)
Ed as a new US Air Force recruit
Ed Tauscher was an all-American boy, born in New Jersey before his family moved to San Francisco and then to the greater Washington area when he was 12 years old in 1973 – some 52 years ago!
As a young boy, he dreamed of one day becoming a pilot, a fireman, a truck driver and/or a cook - achieving two of the four!
His early experiences of the Pacific Northwest were idyllic for a young teenager: the family had a beach house on Whidbey Island and, while there was no running water and only an outhouse, there was a sauna and endless waterfront and hills to explore!
Water was collected by getting into the family boat and rowing along the Puget Sound to a small waterfall coming down the hill, and filling buckets and bottles. Ed was always the first to volunteer to do the boat run, as well as to clear the driveway and cars when there was snow and ice.
He also had a clear vision for his future: it would involve airplanes, firetrucks, trucks and cooking – in one iteration or another. As such, during his high school senior year, he simultaneously took a chef course at a vocational college as well as attending flight school to get a private pilot license – achieving both!
After graduating high school, he worked as a cook, but his love of airplanes took center stage and he joined the US Air Force, hoping to one day pilot Air Force aircraft. But, as the only constant in life is change, he developed Type 1 insulin-dependent diabetes in 1994 – requiring a permanent insulin pump – dashing his hopes of ever piloting for the Air Force. Undeterred, he stayed on and became an aircraft mechanic.
He also served at a very treacherous time for gays in the military: at the time he enlisted you could be dishonorably discharged or even imprisoned for being gay, with no pension or benefits, a provision that was much later replaced by Don’t Ask Don’t Tell under the Clinton administration. But Ed had no qualms about serving his country loyally for 22 years, protecting rights and freedoms that he, as a gay man, did not have at that time in the US, which speaks volumes about who he is as a person, his moral compass, and his commitment to service!
Ed had a late coming out after dating women for many years, only realizing he was gay at 25, when he was already in the service. Despite the incredibly hostile environment to gays in the military and given all he could lose, he remarkably nevertheless entered into a 9-year relationship with a man in Illinois. That ended when he was transferred to Travis Air Force Base in California as his then partner did not want to relocate.
Ed in his US Air Force uniform
We met shortly after, 25 years ago - on St Patrick’s Day 2000 in San Francisco at the Stock Exchange Club – eventually getting married in the city by the Bay in June 2008 following the California Supreme Court’s May decision declaring California’s same-sex marriage ban unconstitutional.
We knew the window to wed was limited as Proposition 8, a CA ballot proposition and a state constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage was on the November ballot. Prop 8 passed in the November 2008 CA state elections – and was later overturned in court - but our marriage stood. The consequence was legal uncertainty and multiple tax filings: as married in CA and single federally. But it was all worth it to have been part of the fight for marriage equality in the US.
Peter & Ed's San Francisco Wedding (June2008)
Peter & Ed's South African safari wedding (March 2009)
We also got married a second time on safari in South Africa - the land of my birth - in February 2009. The irony that we could, at that time, get legally married in the land of apartheid before we could get married in the land of the free was not lost on us.
In 2002, Ed received an honorable discharge from the US Air Force, and I proudly joined his mother and close friend at his retirement ceremony.
While Ed could easily have opted for a life of leisure and pleasure given he receives a monthly military pension and health care benefits for the rest of his life, that is not who he is or the path he chose. Instead, post-retirement from the Air Force, he landed a role as a Service Officer at the American Legion where, for 10-years, he fought each and every day to ensure military veterans received the federal benefits they were promised and deserved under the law.
But, once again, change reared its head as a door opened for us to move abroad for my career. Without hesitation or a second thought, Ed agreed to give up his career and support me as we moved to Paris, then Singapore and then Bangkok. Over those 12 years he devoted his time to volunteering: at a homeless men’s shelter in Paris even though he could barely speak a word of French; at the SPCA in Singapore and, in Bangkok; teaching underprivileged girls English to help transform their lives and economic future, while also helping me run a cat cafe to drive adoption of homeless felines given there are literally millions of homeless cats on the streets of Bangkok alone.
Peter, Ed's mother Fay, Ed, and his good friend Lillian at his official Air Force retirement ceremony (May 2002)
Ed with some of the cats and kittens that we helped find forever homes at the Cat Shelter and Cat Cafe in Bangkok (2020)
We returned to Seattle in late 2022 along with our four cats – all rescued from terrible situations in Southeast Asia - to take care of his elderly mom who has multiple cancers and advanced dementia. But, as he has done throughout his life, Ed’s journey into elderhood still involves finding purpose, fulfillment and personal happiness through helping others – especially even at this difficult time in his personal life - volunteering for a number of organizations including GenPride, PFLAG, and the USO (United Service Organizations).
Ed is the eternal optimist for whom the glass is always half full and, no matter what life throws at him, he takes it in his stride and finds a way to make it work: he manages his health by regularly seeing his doctors and rigorously taking his meds as prescribed; exercising by walking every day and biking; and keeping socially active with friends and activities, including as a proud volunteer for GenPride.
Peter & Ed's South African safari wedding (March 2009)
Ed (left), Peter and his mother at their home in West Seattle (January 2025)
I am inspired by his life story of always putting others first; of service, resilience, and finding purpose and fulfillment through volunteering and giving. As the saying goes: “In life, the true measure of a man is not determined by his wealth or accomplishments, but by the impact he has on others. It is the strength of his character, the depth of his compassion, and the courage to stand up for what is right that truly define him.”
Ed and I hope that you are able to celebrate love this month: be it through self-love or celebrating the love you have for your friends, family, partners or others close to you.
On behalf of all those Ed has touched along his life journey so far – colleagues in the military, wounded service-members, homeless men in Paris, underprivileged women in Bangkok, the thousands of cats in Singapore and Bangkok, and the many folk right here in Seattle through his volunteering, including for GenPride - I say a huge Thank You and I Love You!
Happy Valentine’s Day Ed and every one of you, our most valued GenPride community!
- Peter Galli
